Since our girls have been through the highs and lows with us, is it possible that they would be so much better at making decisions for our lives than we are?
Follow my logic for a moment. . . let’s say you really, really, really want a new job or a new man or whatever it is you are craving. Since it is something that we want so badly, we tend to ignore the red flags and the reasons not to and instead focus on all the reasons it will be wonderful. We slide those rose-colored glasses on and live in a happy world of rainbows and unicorns, completely ignoring the storm clouds ahead.
I totally know that every last one of us is guilty of this at some time or another. Maybe some of us have grown wiser with time, experience and age. . . perhaps you heed the red flags. But when we get our hearts set on why this one thing would be the best thing ever, it is so easy to ignore the details that may show you that this is, in fact, not your dream job or man or whatever.
But, your besties, who know you, oh so well, do not have the same emotional attachment. They can ask the hard questions that you don’t want to face. They can more easily separate the good shit from the bull shit. So maybe, just maybe their opinion should weigh in heavier? Now, I get it, I could not imagine for a second letting go of control of the bad decisions that I make. I swear my messy mistakes are totally a part of my charm but I think back to moments when my besties were totally right about a situation that I powered through, the moments I tried to make work, only to have it blow up in my face. And thankfully, I didn’t have to hear “told you so” until WAYYYY later, when I was recovered from the mishap. I mean, come on, of course friends are going to have to rub their accuracy in your face at some point in time.
This was exactly the topic of conversation that the girls and I had this week. Of course, it was about a bad decision I made several years ago that could have ruined our friendship. As someone that was so insecure that he was completely threatened by the relationship I had with these girls, tried everything he could think of to keep me from them, whatever he could do to make me second guess their loyalty, their friendship, their motives. All the while, these women who had been in my life for years. These women who have always stood by my side. These women who have never wanted anything but the best for me. These women that I should have been listening to tried over and over and over to get me to see what was really going on.
It’s amazing how hindsight really is 20/20 because it is only now that I can see how fucked up my decision making was during that time. I was a fool and I could have lost my very best friends. It’s a good thing they are all so freakin stubborn that they wouldn’t let it or me go! To find the silver lining, it has made me appreciate them more. Not that it should have taken a near miss to finally get me to appreciate what I’ve had all along but that’s the way of life sometimes. . . it takes almost losing something to fully appreciate its beauty and value.
So I want to ask you. . . moving forward. . . do you think I should give them the license to make all the decisions in my life? Do you think the Who’s should have a say in my decision making as well? I mean, y’all hear about all of my shenanigans anyway so I might as let you all have a say too, right?
Um. . . on second thought. . . maybe this is a bit too drastic, but I really don’t think you could mess it up any more than I have in my past! Ha!