Hot and Sticky - By Annie McFarland

You know that quote, ‘be with someone who ruins your lipstick, not your mascara’? Well. .  .I have to tell you, that I am totally cool with The Hammer ruining my lipstick AND my mascara. Y’all, my mascara was smeared all over the place last night and it was not because of tears, if you know what I mean. <wink, wink>
I’ve decided that I’m going all in on this blog. . . it might get a little dirty. . .you might learn more about me than you ever wanted to know. . .and you might forevermore look at me differently. 
But I’m doing it anyway. . .so buckle up, buttercup!
I am totally smitten with The Hammer. Did I really just say smitten? I am almost embarrassed with myself but it’s true! Y’all. . .he is just, what are the right words? I really want to say all that and a bag of chips but I really can’t follow up ‘smitten’ with an expression from a decade ago, can I? Well, you get the idea, he’s awesome.
Last night was date night and since he’s getting new floors in his condo, he’s staying in a super swanky hotel and he invited me down for dinner and. . . 
You know. . .dinner and drinks, dinner, drinks and a nightcap. <another - wink, wink> 
After a swoon worthy dinner. . .seriously, I don’t know what is wrong with me and my old timey terms today, I have fallen deeper ‘in like’ with him. I really think he’s a good one and I did not want the night to end! Being around him just makes me happy and he makes me laugh and he’s so freakin charming. 
Stay focused, Annie. . .after dinner, he ordered a dessert that came with chocolate sauce and caramel sauce in individual boats. He gives me the sly look and says, ‘should we bring these up to the room?’ Wellllll. . . after an amazing dinner with this awesome guy, plus being a little bit liquored up, I am feeling especially sexy, so that’s a big fat yes from me!
Our sever comes to clear the table and deliver the check, as she is about to take away our, soon to be, very naughty chocolate and caramel boats, he puts his hand up and asks to keep them on the table. Then, as if he just cannot help himself, he adds, ‘I’m actually going to be taking these up to the room but I promise to bring them back down tomorrow.’ <one more - wink, wink>
I have to be honest, I have never been one to use food a lot. . .ya know. . .for sexy time but for The Hammer, I literally cannot wait! I had assumed that we would be getting naked at some point this evening, I mean, dinner at the hotel that he is staying at, but I suddenly feel so grateful that I shaved and moisturized all the important parts.
In order to properly hydrate before my upcoming ‘workout’, I reach over and grab a glass of water on the table. After a long sip, I realize it’s his glass of water and I say, ‘oops, sorry. I just drank your water.’ He looks at me, pauses, gives me a smirk and replies, ‘I’m going to be licking chocolate and caramel off of every inch of you, I think we can share a water.’
UMMMMMMM. . ..excuse me. . .goose bumps and tingles all over. It is time to get the hell out of this restaurant and up to the room.
I don’t know how much detail I should share but, LAWD, HAVE MERCY! That man knows how to play this instrument and the addition of the chocolate sauce made the kisses last even longer. 
The feel of warm chocolate drizzled on my body, his tongue moving up and down to lick it off, us being sticky as we pressed together. . .ahhhhhh. . .. it was HOT! 
Before you ask, yes, he did spank me. . . that may be the moment when my mascara got smeared on the sheets! 
<now, I can’t help myself, wink, wink>
I am in that new relationship stage when I want to be next to him all the time. I crave his kisses and his touch. This man is somethin’ else and I have a happy, sticky glow today because of him.
Now, before I wrap this up, let me chime in with my sensible side. Thank god we were in a hotel room, so I didn’t lie there worrying about having to clean the sheets because of the beautiful mess we made! I am officially apologizing to the cleaning staff that had to scrub up after us. 
I am curious if any of you prefer to add something sticky and sweet to your sexy time or if the idea of cleaning it makes it unappealing to you?
 -  Annie
Oh. . .and since we have been such a thirsty bunch this week because of our Piper Lou Dudes shirtless competition, I hope this blog was just dirty enough to add a little fuel to that fire.

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