You know those moments in life that truly test your character? The moments you never see coming but suddenly you are faced with a choice. . .RISE or RUN.
That moment when a friend sends a text in a group chat, calling out an emergency. . . are you the person who will jump into action and help or do you kinda hold back and see if someone else in the group will be the cream and rise to the occasion? Or those feats of strength when a mother will lift a car off her injured child.
As many of you know, I was plopped right smack into a test of my character this week when DC was injured on the ski slopes. I don’t know if you are like me but being a caregiver and dealing with medical stuff is so not my thing. We all have our gifts in life, I am fully aware that injury, blood, broken bones is not where my gifts lie.
Give me a drink and ask me to entertain. . . that I can do. Be the life of the party? Yup. . . bring it on. Public speaking? Easy! Care giving. . . uh. . .no.
Knowing this, I hope you realize the Herculean feat and depth of character it took for me to survive DC’s injury. Don’t think I don’t realize how selfish this sounds. . .I totally know it and yes, that is a loud BEEP BEEP you are hearing as I sit here tooting my own horn. Quite honestly, him surviving my care giving is probably a way bigger accomplishment but let me have this moment.
We have been dating for 5 weeks. . . yes. . . 5 WEEKS when the accident on the ski slopes happened. He had to be rushed to the hospital and Lawd help us all, he was released to my care.
At no point during the crisis, did I want to run. In fact, at no point during the hellish 3 days of getting him back home did I want to run, I was willing to do anything and everything in my power to help him. But it took everything I had in me to offer that support. Hearing him cry out in pain when I had to shift his leg to pack more ice, cut me deep. Seeing the pain in his eyes as he tried to stand so we could move to the next location was brutal. And I know it killed him a little bit inside that I had to pack up the house, pack up the suitcases, move the luggage, load the car and drive us out of ski country and closer to his desperately needed surgery, because that is the kind of guy he is, he wanted to take care of us and he couldn’t.
I think most of us would do the exact same thing if faced with this situation, but it does not come without cost. My body aches from lifting him and moving him. I am beyond tired from waking up multiple times per night to check on him make sure he’s breathing or to get him his next dose of pain meds. I can guaran-fucking-tee it that I have sprouted a dozen new grey hairs and wrinkles in the past few days and I am already dreaming of a Calgon take me away moment!
Even though this is a brand-new relationship and quite frankly we should still be flirting, wooing, dinner dating and maybe a little Netflix and chilling, we have quickly graduated to a level of intimacy that takes years to establish. . .all because of a ski weekend gone wrong and a shattered knee.
We have truly seen each other at our worst during a time when we should still be attempting to put our best foot forward. Will this be the glue that holds us together and this is a story we will tell for years to come? Or will this end up being too much too soon and we burn out just as quickly as this whole relationship started?
Only time will tell, but one thing I can say for sure. . .this experience has shown me the type of man he is so. . . on my end. . . I can definitely see a future. At this moment, I am totally believing that he feels very differently after witnessing, firsthand my Kathy Bates style of care giving, I swear to God, I was born without the compassion gene.
Y’all, I’ll keep you posted on how this whole shit show unfolds but to make me feel better, I want to hear you toot your horn of when you were the cream and rose to the top!